goldenclitoris:

THIS IS TRULY THE WILDEST SHIT I HAVE EVER SEEN AND I LOVE IT

iceemoon:

"i’m 10% german, 14% danish, 15% norwegian, 7% …"

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matesprit:

matesprit:

when i was 12 a comment i made got into a ray william johnson video

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this was who i used to be

constantbullshitting:

oilauren:

"I looked at my hand and my little finger was gone – the bone was sticking out. It’s the weirdest feeling; one second you’re fine and your little finger is there, and the next second it’s gone. It shoves reality up your backside. I was in so much pain and shock that the first thing that hit my head was the beat and the bass. The bass was hard, so I just ripped off my top, wrapped it around my finger and tied it up as tight as I could and skanked it out for half an hour. My mentality was, ‘I’ve only been here for an hour, I’ve paid £10 for this night, I’ve lost my little finger – am I seriously going to go? Nah, I’m going to skank until I can’t skank any more.’ After that, my mate dragged me down to the paramedics."
Friends later told him that a “bunch of stoners found [his] little finger and were playing catch with it.”

now THAT’S what i call a party

constantbullshitting:

oilauren:

"I looked at my hand and my little finger was gone – the bone was sticking out. It’s the weirdest feeling; one second you’re fine and your little finger is there, and the next second it’s gone. It shoves reality up your backside. I was in so much pain and shock that the first thing that hit my head was the beat and the bass. The bass was hard, so I just ripped off my top, wrapped it around my finger and tied it up as tight as I could and skanked it out for half an hour. My mentality was, ‘I’ve only been here for an hour, I’ve paid £10 for this night, I’ve lost my little finger – am I seriously going to go? Nah, I’m going to skank until I can’t skank any more.’ After that, my mate dragged me down to the paramedics."

Friends later told him that a “bunch of stoners found [his] little finger and were playing catch with it.”

now THAT’S what i call a party

hobbitofthemotherfuckinshire:

when you and a friend drag a bitch at the same time 

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railroadsoftware:

me: (farts right before leaving a store)
my girlfriend: oh wait I want to look at this one last thing
me: no we got to go right now

sadtit:

sadvaporwavebabe:

please dont name your children after flowers (rose, daisy, lily, etc.) unless you are plantkin it is cultural appropriation

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pecancat:

They aren’t wrong

pecancat:

They aren’t wrong